Written on the whiteboard on my fridge this morning

"I was more surprised to learn that Shirley MacLaine had a house here than that Dennis Kucinich thought he saw a UFO here." -- author unknown

Chris Matthews on Kasparov

A great quote by Chris Matthews right after Bill Maher interviews Gary Kasparov:

"Do you ever get the feeling that the Russians are playing chess, and we're playing checkers?"

Deep thought from my AI textbook

"Consider the sentence:

J. R. Lucas cannot consistently assert that this sentence is true.

If Lucas asserted this sentence then he would be contradicting himself, so therefore Lucas cannot consistently assert it, and hence it must be true. (The sentence cannot be false, because if it were then Lucas could not consistently assert it, so it would be true.) We have thus demonstrated that there is a sentence that Lucas cannot consistently assert while other people (and machines) can. But that does not make us think less of Lucas."

Like, whoah, man...

Qualifications for being President

A truer sentiment, methinks, has never been expressed...

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
- Gore Vidal

A disturbing truth

The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money.
- David Richerby

A good summary of my distaste for musicals

Anything too stupid to be said is sung.

-- Voltaire

Nigga please!

Oh well done. I'm sure now that New York has (symbolically) banned the word "nigger," everybody will stop using it. And they'll get along better. And puppies will shit rainbows.

For fuck's sake people...stop trying to control language. Just fucking stop it. Ok? It has never worked. Ever. And it's arrogant, and irritating. I defer to Reverend Carlin:

"There's a different group to get pissed off at you in this country for everything your not supposed to say. Can't say Nigger, Boogie, Jig, Jigaboo, Skinhead, Mooli, moolinyon, Schvatzit, Junglebunny. Greaser, Greaseball, Dago, Guinea, Whop, Ginzo, Kike, Zebe, Heed, Yid, Mocky, Himie, Mick, Donkey, Turkey, Limey, Frog. Zip, Zipperhead, Squarehead, Crout, Hiney, Jerry, Hun, Slope, Slopehead, Chink, Gook. There is absolutely nothing wrong with any of those words in and of themselves. They're only words. It's the context that counts. It's the user. It's the intention behind the words that makes them good or bad. The words are completely neutral. The words are innocent. I get tired of people talking about bad words and bad language. Bullshit! It's the context that makes them good or bad. The context. That makes them good or bad. For instance, you take the word "nigger." There is absolutely nothing wrong with the word "nigger" in and of itself. It's the racist asshole who's using it that you ought to be concerned about. We don't mind when Richard Pryer or Eddie Murphy say it. Why? Because we know they're not racist. They're niggers! Context. Context!"

-- George Carlin

Do you idiots really think that if it had been illegal to say "nigger" that Michael Richards wouldn't have boarded that bus to crazy town that night? Or that young black guys will suddenly have more self-respect? Or that anything would have changed at all? Ever? Do something fucking useful with your time instead of picking words out of the dictionary to get upset about. If the past few weeks have demonstrated anything it's that some other equivalent word will just pop up to take the place of the one you don't like. Like, perhaps, "clean."

Man, humor, legislature

It's probably the fact that it's 4 in the morning, but I really liked this quote:

Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.

-- Samual Butler

You are an atheist

To celebrate Jesus' birthday, I thought I'd share one of my favorite quotes:

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."

-- Stephen Henry Roberts

Merry Christmas. ;)

An entertaining quote

Maybe it's just that it's 3 am, but I found this to be a great quote:

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.
-- Rod Serling

Also liked this:

I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.
-- Woody Allen